Books That Helped me Become a Better Mentor to my Children

Mentors can come into our lives in various shapes and sizes.  The following books have been mentors to me at the times I needed and since then.  They have helped me become a better person, a better mentor, and a better mother and wife.  This list of books has my thoughts on the books and how they helped me in my journey.

Mentoring in Home Education

How to Read a Book

By Mortimer Adler

This book was monumental for my understanding of how to read a book, what questions to ask of each book, and how to read specific genres.  It has been helpful for me to know how to lead discussions with my children in their readings and what I want to teach them to get out of books.  He also teaches you how to mark your books and the importance of doing so.  This has to be one of the most valuable books on educating myself and my children that I have read.  It is full of the tools you need.  It goes along with the Chinese Proverb: “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.”

Arm the Children

By Arthur Henry King

One of the most intensely intelligent books I have ever read. I had to pauses after each chapter and truly digest the rich meat of wisdom. I have written several articles based on a few things he talks about in this book. Every LDS parent should read this book.  It isn’t just about children, however.  This title may fool you a bit.  It includes everything from Arthur King’s conversion to education in the home, to art, to his views on the atonement. This is on the top ten of my lists of books to read and reread.

The Well Educated Mind

By Susan Wise Bauer

This book was very helpful to me as a mother learning about the classic books that are available and trying to decide which ones will be worth reading.  I’m always trying to find classic books that will help make us better individuals while discerning which ones may not work well for our family.  Her lists helped tremendously for me to know which ones I’m interested in and which ones to steer clear of.  I also appreciated her knowledge and insight of how to read certain classics and along with How to Read a Book I feel I have a good idea of what to look for in books.  I also have a greater understanding of the classic trivium now thanks to this book.

The Read-Aloud Handbook    

By Jim Trelease

This is an excellent book filled with information that every parent and grandparent should read. It is one I will often re-read to keep myself inspired on reading aloud to the family and the importance of keeping up with the sustained silent reading (SSR) as a family.

Honey for a Child's Heart: The Imaginative Use of Books in Family Life

By Hunt, Gladys

Both this book and the Read-Aloud Handbook together give you excellent lists and resources sharing and explaining the importance of reading to your children.  

All of the books by Oliver DeMille regarding the Thomas Jefferson Education {or leadership education} and have been helpful for me as a mother and mentor. These books in succession began me on the journey to homeschool and giving me knowledge and confidence when I needed the boost.  They keep me inspired and empowered again and again.

Mentoring in Keeping my Children’s Hearts and Nurturing their Spirits

Our family’s central canon includes the Bible, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price.  These are read regularly as a family and also individually.  As a mother, I go to my religious sources {our central canon} and in prayer to find many answers in raising my family and to be more in tune to their needs.

Keeping Our Children's Hearts: Our Vital Priority

By Steven and Teri Maxwell

Written by parents of eight children, I've looked to the Maxwell's book for wisdom in raising my large family since 2005.  This has been a core book detailing why we do what we do and make the rules we do as parents.  We started implementing the suggestions in this book at a crucial time when I felt that I was losing my children's hearts. This was upsetting to me and just at the time I didn't know where else to go, a mentor lent me this book and it was instrumental in changing our children and reclaiming their hearts.  Because of this knowledge and the information shared in this book that we implemented in our family, we've entered the teen years with our children with confidence and peace.  I can't say enough great things about this book and how helpful it has been for me as a mother.

Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves

By C. Terry Warner

This book has changed my life. It has helped me see something I've tried for years to figure out, but could never quite get it and that is self-deception. Self deception causes many problems in relationships and in yourself and the struggles you may be having. It was an amazingly powerful book. The first half explains in great and simple detail what self deception is and the many forms it takes. The latter half explains to you how to get rid of it. I love how this book makes you do the thinking and is not a "step by step" process on how to live your life. As a mother it has helped me in making sure I’m coming from a pure place and being able to see the signs of self-deception in my children so that I can teach them another way.

As I’ve been putting together the previous resources I’ve used over the years I’ve had many memories of the searching and struggles before I found these books.  Tears have come to my eyes as I’ve recalled these moments of searching and pondering.  The tears are mostly from gratitude that I’ve been so blessed to be led to these resources.  Please keep in mind that this is not a randomly thrown together list, but a list full of years of searching and finding, asking and receiving, and because of this these are some of the most important books I have been blessed with thus far {as my journey is far from over}.  I’m grateful for the journey and I’m grateful for the knowledge presented to me in these books.  I hope they are helpful to you for your journey as mentor and mother.

Notes from Writing Conference

My husband and I really enjoyed seeing Andrew Pudewa from the Institute of Excellence in Writing and Andrew Kern from the CiRCE Institute today. I love that we live in a place that has the option to go to these various conventions and programs.

Here are some notes from today. I hope they help. I'm so inspired and uplifted

and would love to pass some of that on to you too.

Notes from Andrew Kern's Lectures:

*Small improvements are the way to move on your path.
*Husband means to nurture and bless what is in your care.
*Israel means to wrestle with God. We gather strength from what we wrestle with.
*If you want to understand language better, read Tolkien.
*All of your life is determined by the questions you ask.
*The quality of teaching is determined by the questions you ask.
*Children learn by the questions they absorb.
*Training depends on the questions you ask.
*Everything begins with a question.

*Engage the will to seek answers to questions:

1 Attentive Perception {the father of learning}
Pay attention
When you give something your attention it shows that you care. It's fidelity.
It is being faithful to what it is. It is the 1st act of love.

2 Recollection {re-collection} {the mother of learning}
Go back and recall it
Memory
Memory makes you smarter and its been removed from public/private curriculum.
We are making fools of ourselves by not using memory.

*A child is a soul that contemplates as it receives.
*Recollection is faithfulness

3 Contemplation
Recalling and comparing
Comparing is a gift from God.
It is: acceptance, adoration, a gazing

4 Conceptualization
The fruit of contemplation
Our souls are then changes
Formation transforms us from within.
When truth enters our souls we are transformed.

5 Represent {re-present}
When truth is formed this can happen.

*Train these five faculties to become good at anything.
*We love memory. We feed on these things. This is what learning is.
*Blessed learning begets enchantment.

Reading Great Books {Notes}

*A great book has a form/analogies that embody truth.
*Every culture has great folktales and myths.
*Avoid the formless and the void.
~Creation is making forms and filling them. Avoid informal, non-imaginative, and relevant books.
*Read aloud, narrations, copy, memorize, and discuss.
*Read attentively
*By reading great books you are ordering the mind to think.

*Image from Google Images

What is TJED?

I’ve been thinking about Mr. Allen all day. I remember the first day of his class, High School Sophomore English, more than 20 years ago. He was slightly crippled and used a cane to help him walk. Each leg swung far to the outside with every step he took. Slowly, he made his way to the front of the classroom. Like I did with all teachers, I quickly summed him up: slow walk, John Lennon glasses, long red beard, kind of “hippy” looking... Mr. Allen would be easy. I should be able to get away with a minimum of work and a maximum of goofing off.
I remember the first thing he asked the class, “How do people learn?” I wondered what the “right” answer to that was. How do people learn? By going to school? By taking tests? By doing homework? All of these answers were submitted by the class, but quickly rejected by Mr. Allen. After many more guesses, someone in the back called out, “We don’t know. You tell us.”
Mr. Allen replied with a “You don’t know how to learn? How sad.”
After the laughter died down, he told us the answer: “People learn through stories.”
I didn’t really believe him. Even as he went on to talk about ancient tribes gathering around the cooking fire to share their histories, legends and oral traditions, to the transformative power of religious texts, Shakespeare and even Dr. Seuss, I remained largely unconvinced.
I had always loved reading. I grew up in a troubled home and reading was my escape. From an early age, I read every kind of story I could get my hands on… but that wasn’t learning. That was fun, relaxation, or relief from the pressures of my life. Learning happened at school, right?
Fast forward a few years and you would find me sitting in an American History class in college. I was taking notes on a lecture about the Civil War. When I read the chapter in the textbook I felt intrigued, but listening to the passion coming from the professor was more than intriguing; it was inspiring. I wanted to know more about the Civil War. I wanted to be able to speak with such informed passion. The problem was I didn’t know how to get there. The thought of walking into a library and just picking up a book was overwhelming to me. With a subject so wide and deep, which books would give me the information I wanted? What I really needed, but didn’t recognize at the time, was a mentor, someone to help me find quality sources that would enrich my understanding and guide me through my effort to earn the knowledge I desired. I remember leaving the class that day feeling frustrated at wanting to learn more, to be more, but not knowing how. I got an A in American History, but didn’t gain much else.
I didn’t know how to learn. How sad.
Fast forward again, many years later, and you will find me as a wife and mother. My husband and I do not send our daughter, "Newt" to school, but have chosen to help her seek her education at home. I consider myself blessed to have been acquainted with the principles of Thomas Jefferson Education early in my journey, though I feel that even three years later, I am just now beginning to gain an understanding and appreciation for them.
Earlier this week, I tried to answer the question, “What is TJED?” It was a hard question. I wrote two pages about the 4 phases of learning and the 7 keys of great teaching, but never got to the essence of what a Thomas Jefferson Education really is.
Last Sunday I made banana bread. My TJED essay was like being asked about my banana bread and me replying that it had some bananas, sugar and flour, eggs and yogurt, crystallized ginger, chocolate chips and some other things I don’t remember.
A partial list of ingredients doesn’t even begin to tell what that banana bread was. It doesn’t mention the way that I personalized the recipe to fit my family’s tastes and values, like the farm fresh eggs and homemade yogurt I used in place of commercial products. It doesn’t tell about how the comforting smell of bananas and cinnamon filled my home while it baked. It certainly doesn’t mention how dense and rich the final product was, or how the spicy bite of ginger perfectly balanced the bittersweet coolness of melting chocolate on my tongue. And how could that sad little list ever begin to convey the feeling of warm satisfaction my family had after eating that delicious banana bread? Indeed, the only way for someone to really get a sense of what that treat was like is to cut off a big slice, slather it with freshly whipped cream and experience it for yourself.
The same goes for a Thomas Jefferson Education. The only way to really know what it is is to dive in and experience for yourself. All I can do is try to relate what it is to me.

TJED is freedom.
All morning as I’ve contemplated this idea, I’ve had a few lines from The Lion King’s I Just Can’t Wait to be King running through my head:
No one saying do this
No one saying be there
No one saying stop that
No one saying see here
Free to run around all day
Free to do it all my way!
I have come to recognize that even as young as she is, Newt has a right to choose what she learns. I could (and have tried to from time to time) force facts into her head, but that is not learning, that is submitting.
Of course, this freedom does not mean a free-for-all anything goes mentality – not in TJED philosophy and not in our home. We are guided by the principles and values we learn in our personal core classic. For our family, the core classic is the twin works of the Bible and Book of Mormon. As we study and discuss these works daily, they give us a framework on which to build our lives. From there, we can choose other good works and pursuits to further inspire and build us.
Through the principles of TJED, I have the freedom to study. It is not selfish to fulfill my own desires to learn and to know. As my daughter and I each progress in our personal studies, there is freedom to become whatever we desire and to learn what we will need to fulfill our individual life missions. There is freedom to learn at our own pace without the artificial limits imposed by the hourly bell, semesters and grades. Without those constraints, we are free to explore our individual passions and interests, whatever they may be.
Last summer, my daughter and I were jumping on our trampoline together when our conversation turned to books. I remember it clearly because it was one of the first fruits of TJED I had been able to really experience in our family. “Mom, you know what I think? I think The Lord of the Rings is kind of like the scriptures. You know when Sam carries Frodo? That’s a lot like Jesus sacrificing for each of us. Harry Potter is like that too, when he is willing to die for his friends. They make me want to try to be better. Do you know any books like that?”
What if I had not deemed those books “worthy academic pursuits”? Or worse, what if I had killed them with endless worksheets and literary analysis? I know they would not have become a part of my daughter’s soul the way they have, nor would she trust me with any feelings that survived the “educating” process.

TJED both builds and requires trust.
As I consciously try to keep from imposing my own will upon my daughter’s studies, she gains a greater trust in me. She trusts me to guide and teach, not dictate or require.
Trust is required in those dark times I lie awake at night fighting the demons of worry.
Is she learning enough?
What if she never decides to learn long-division?
Am I doing enough?
Am I doing too much?
Would she do better in school?
Is she behind?
And then I think of the children of A Wrinkle in Time’s Camazotz. Each was required to be perfect. Every citizen had surrendered his freedom to It. There was no worry, but there was no joy. That was the price of absolute conformity, of giving up their rights to choose.
I can not know that this path will lead my child to worldly standards of success, but I can know, because I see growing evidence of it each day, that it will teach her to think and to choose for herself. I know that freedom can be messy, painful, and challenging, but also joyful and immensely satisfying. I trust that with the help of her mentors, my daughter will choose the education she will need to be who she is meant to be.
TJED is hard work, but that doesn’t always mean drudgery.
Reading Mark Twain’s The Adventures of Tom Sawyertogether we learned

Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do and play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do. And this would help [Tom] to understand why constructing artificial flowers or performing on a treadmill is work, while rolling ten pins or climbing Mount Blanc is only amusement. There are wealthy gentlemen in England who drive four-horse passenger coaches twenty or thirty miles on a daily line, in the summer, because the privilege costs them considerable money; but if they were offered wages for the service, that would turn it into work and they would resign.

Once again, it all hinges on freedom.
TJED is relationships.
It always saddens me when I hear people wishing that their children’s vacation would come to an end and they would go back to school. Working and studying together, having meaningful discussions and playing all contribute to a rich and full family culture. Though our relationships are far from perfect, we truly love to be together. My husband and I have recently sought to strengthen our daughter’s familial relationships beyond our own home with weekly Family History lessons at Grandma’s. While she may be learning about family group sheets and the census, the deeper lessons are about belonging. Today she came home with stories about one great-grandfather who was one of the forest rangers to rescue Smoky the Bear and another who made the coffin for the man who killed Billy the Kid. These stories become a part of who she is and how she views the world.
TJED is classics. The scriptures, Shakespeare, Dickens, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, A Wrinkle in Time, Tom Sawyer, mythology, poetry, biographies and histories, mathematics and science – all classics have a way of getting inside of us and we can not remain unchanged. The more we study, together or on our own, the more we learn about ourselves. When confronted with a difficult situation, we can draw on the character attributes of Pollyanna, Ralph Moody, Jane Eyre, Sophie Germain or even my own Grandpa Hill and gain strength. To paraphrase what my daughter told me, good books make us want to be a better people.
To a certain degree, each person is the author of his own life. We have chosen that TJED will be a central theme in our family’s.
It may have come twenty years later, but I have discovered the truth: people do learn by stories.
I think Mr. Allen would be proud.

What is TJED to you?


Meet Heidi, our newest TJED Mothers contributor.
Heidi is a stay-at-homeschooling mama to "Newt" age 10 and a best-friend, partner and wife to Walt. Nothing else she does will ever be as important.
Heidi blogs at Frantically Simple about homeschooling, parenting, real food, and life in general. Check out her new series there - For Thy Sake: Teaching Children to Value Family Work.

The author is using amazon affiliate links. Any purchases made through these links will result in the author receiving a small commission. All opinions and text are her own.

Learning: The Epiphany Rate

“It is not what a boy has, but what he is, that makes him valuable to the world, and the world valuable to him.”

A couple of months ago, I bought the book, “Ten Boys Who Lived on the Road from Long Ago” by Jane Andrews which was written in 1898. Each chapter shares stories and insight into a twelve year old boy’s life from more than four thousand years ago all the way to the boy who lived in 1888. Andrews shares information about how each boy throughout the ages dressed, lived, schooled and worked in the form of stories.

During the first part of the book the kids were not as thrilled about my pulling it out to read. We would read one chapter at a time and then move on to the next reading book. Despite their resistance, we learned a lot about history, geography, old names of countries like China, traditions, and old weapons. Instead of learning from a dry, watered down text book, we learned through stories of young boy’s lives and it had more impact on us.

By the time we got to the end of the book, the children all commented how good the book was. I smiled because I remembered the times that they would complain because it was dry and the language is sometimes hard to understand. None of that was important in the end. What was important was how the book changed their perspective and increased their knowledge.

In implementing the Thomas Jefferson Leadership education model in personal and family education I love Dr. Oliver DeMille’s idea of the ER or “Epiphany Rate”. He said it’s not the word count or how many books you read that’s important it’s the “Epiphany Rate” or how many times something connects in your mind, makes sense, teaches, or helps you understand. The Epiphany Rate should be your gauge when reading. When I heard that on his recent audio “Lessons from Four Types of Leadership Education” it really made sense to me. I thought of the recent books that changed my life because of the power of the written word, books like the Count of Monte Cristo, and all that I learned about life and even myself as I read the book. Dr. DeMille says this is what we should look for when reading a classic book- the ER or “Epiphany Rate” and it is one I’m now paying attention to when reading books with my children and myself.

Mom's Need Inspiring Too.

As I have mentioned in a previous posting, this is the first year that I am incorporating a plan, albeit a simple one, for my own personal education as a integral part of my children's education. Perhaps, I am moving beyond the core phase myself. It just felt like time. Not that I wasn't doing things that further developed my own personal "well," it is just more formally planned and known by those around me. Before... it was rather spur of the moment. I would share something I read to the kids. Show them something new I learned and always made it a point to share with them when I learned something new. This year... I am formally doing my own studies... still working out what exactly...but still... Mom is "homeschooling" too.

Like many homeschooling moms, I practically devoured any homeschooling information out there. Which of course, made things overwhelming given all the philosophies and options out there, but in doing so, I began to notice a pattern. The ones that seemed most appealing to me all seemed to overlap. Before TJED, the philosophies of Rudolf Steiner (Waldorf Education), were the most appealing but very different than my traditional educational background (aka- My conveyor Belt Education). Much of it just felt right and in my limited study of it seemed to flow naturally in our family. And when I discovered TJED... the two seemed to flow together and TJED was, for our family, a answer to many missing gaps.

Today... I was reading one of my favorite Waldorf Inspired blogs, The Magic Onions, it had a post on the importance of the continual education of Parents and Teachers. It's words spoke so clearly to me. Especially at a time when my personal development is at the forefront of my thoughts these days. Let me share with you some quotes (in red) that I found very inspiring.

Blogger, Melisa Nielsen, shares a quote from Rudolph Steiners, Rhythms of Learning. "The Self Education of adults is essential for the Waldorf approach to educating children, because Waldorf does not consist solely of methods, techniques, or structures, but rather the development of human capacities – those of the children but also, and more importantly, those of teachers and parents.”

I love the phrase, "the development of human capacities." Isn't it wonderful that there isn't a end to that capacity?

Don't you just love the blessings of the internet (and I admit it has its evils too). I think it is vital to remember the Philosophy of "Inspire, not require" doesn't only just apply to how you educate your children. I get so bogged down on requirements, that I placed on myself ,and when I see postings and informations such as this and the other I will mention... it is a breath of fresh air. I need a good homeschooling community of not only real life friends but virtual kindred spirits that inspire me to greater things.

Another awesome posting today I read on Mama Seasons, (nice to know other mamas get "the funk" too. Check out this quote she found:

From the unschooling site:

“If you think you can’t provide a rich, stimulating environment for your kids, maybe they *are* better off in school. Send them.

But if you know that the whole wide world is rich and stimulating, then GET OUT THERE! DO things, BE with your kids. Find cool places to go. Bring new things home. Quit b#@%**’!

If you knew you only had a year more with that child, what would you expose him to? Where would you go? What would you eat? What would you watch? What would you do?

If you had only ONE year—and then it was all over, what would you do? Four seasons. Twelve months. 365 days.

Do that THIS year. And the next.”

Can I just tell you how much I needed that. I can only hope that a life lived to its fullest, is one that won't be regretted. Just how much I need to let go and have faith in the learning process. Back to the Magic Onions, she goes on to talk about just that. Read the posting and think about how it applies to your style. While it is of course from a Waldorf perspective you could easily replace the word Waldorf with "educating children" or even TJED

“The self-education of adults is essential to educating children, because educating children does not consist solely of methods, techniques, or structures, but rather the development of human capacities – those of the children but also, and more importantly, those of teachers and parents.”

Now take a look at this additional Rudolf Steiner Quote. I am going to interject some TJED corresponding stuff in red.

“If one observes children who, through proper upbringing, have developed a natural reverence for the adults around them [CORE Phase}, and if one follows them through their various phase of life[TJED_ Core, Love of Learning, scholar, Depth and Mission], one may discover that their feelings for reverence and devotion in childhood gradually transform during the years leading to old age. As adults, such persons may have a healing effect on others, so that through their mere presence, tone of voice, or perhaps a single glance they spread inner peace to others.[Perhaps this can be attributed to a completion of each phase, few or no gaps or repair work to be done] Their presence can be a blessing, because as children they have learned to venerate and to pray in the right way. No hands can bless in old age, unless in childhood they have been folded in prayer.[For many families, this is a vital part of the Core Phase]”

The beauty in this, is that even though we are having to do all of this "repair work" for ourselves, our kids don't necessarily have to... depending on you. I know... pressure. But remember... "It's about YOU, not them." Focus on healing you and and that inner work you do now will affect your posterity. Ok... enough for such a late night. Just thought I would share some inspiration I found today.

Note to self... get a copy of

“Rhythms of Learning” by Steiner

and check out the unschooling site.

It's good to be homeschooling. Now its your turn... share with us your inspiration. What is inspiring you to develop your personal education?

Mother's learn Too

Our family plans on starting structured time schooling again August 2nd and that doesn't mean just the kids going back to school. The philosophies of A Thomas Jefferson Education that influence our homeschooling involves me too. One of those philosophies involves mom.... "It's about YOU, not them." If they don't see me studying then how can I expect the same of them? All too often though they see my studies in scrapbooking and knitting as craft time. While I may be researching techniques to apply or following a pattern... to them it looks like fun and not the work that they are accomplishing. So I thought this fall during our structured time, there would also be "schooling for mom." What is glorious about this is that it forces me to take the time to learn something that I have been putting off or to read something I haven't. I thought for now, a modest goal of reading four books and a topic to delve into and then share with my kids would be a mother-sized goal for me. So when we go to the Library, I have a task of books to seek out as they do. They can see me study in a way they do and not just in the fun ways.

So lets start with the four books. I figured I should get back to working on the Thomas Jefferson Education 5 Pillars Certification books and also put the requirement that I write a book report about each one.

Shakespeare, Taming of the Shrew

Holt, How Children Learn

Lewis, The Abolition of Man

Stowe, Uncle Tom’s Cabin

So.... what about this project? I figure that it needed to be something that I want to learn a skill in. Perhaps something that would put me out of my comfort zone.... just a little. I was thinking perhaps Photography. Perhaps I could sign up for a class through the rec center or community college, but then I wondered if it would inspire in me a huge dissatisfaction with our camera. Well that is one option, but what else?

I also really need to learn to sew. The kids wants so many costumes and what nots... it would be nice to have the talents to do those things. But once again, I worry that the kids will think I am having more fun than them. Hehehehe! Part of my reason for doing this is, that not only do I want to make cool things but I also want Cassie to have these skills going into her adult life (and some basic sewing at least for the boys too) as I didn't have them. So perhaps a class at JoAnn's fabric or the Rec Center.So for now, I have at least two topics to ponder and decide on. So how about you? What do you plan on learning this coming fall. Don't forget to take time to continue learning yourselves.

Do You Have An Education?

No, I’m not speaking about a degree or initials attached to the end of your name. I’m speaking of a true education. The following two quotes define an education very well:

“The only purpose of education is to teach a student how to live his life-by developing his mind and equipping him to deal with reality. The training he needs is theoretical, i.e., conceptual. He has to be taught to think, to understand, to integrate, to prove. He has to be taught the essentials of the knowledge discovered in the past-and he has to be equipped to acquire further knowledge by his own effort.” ~Ayn Rand

“The aim of education should be to teach us rather how to think, than what to think—rather to improve our minds, so as to enable us to think for ourselves, than to load the memory with the thoughts of other men.” ~Bill Beattie

Do you know about the past, the TRUE past, not just watered down facts from a history book? What about the past President’s and their wives? What about the lives and writings of great people such as Pope, Byron, Cervantes, Sir Walter Scott, etc.? Half a century ago everyone knew these people and all were familiar with their writings and many could even quote them.

One sign of an education is that one becomes less interest in trivial and mind-wasting topics such as what drama the latest star has gotten involved in or who broke up with whom in Hollywood. Those who value their education and by extension their minds are choosy about what they watch on television and how much they watch. They also are watch guards over how and what their children watch. The educated know that just like food feeds the body and either strengthens or tears down one’s health, the same applies to what one feeds the mind as in media: books, TV, music and internet.

Scientists have proven that those who are actively using their brains to learn new things tend not to acquire diseases such as Alzheimer’s later in life. The educated are always striving to improve their knowledge and enjoy learning deep, spiritual and thought provoking ideas.

The saying, “Great minds talk about ideas, average minds talk about events and small minds talk about other people” is true. Think of the conversations lately in your home, especially among the adults. What category do you fall in? Being conscious of what we are doing and saying is important in improving oneself. Once you become aware of what category you are in, hold yourself more accountable and if you should need to do some changing, make that change today.

Take a person off the street today and ask them what makes a person great. Many will answer things like: fame, fortune, influence (we’ll define as worldly influence), position, or status. Society has become ignorant to the fact that they are ignorant. Just because someone has power- like a president or king, or money, or worldly fame and influence does not make him great.

So what does make a person great? The answer includes but is not limited to: morals, religious conviction and belief, personal ethics code, and education. Years ago I read a book about one hundred key great and important people throughout the ages. They all had their own struggles and trials, but each great man and woman had one main thing in common-a true classically based education, most had a self taught classical education. Their education was acquired through the reading of classic books. Through the classics they learned to think deeply, attain self-mastery, and to discover and live their mission in life.

The saying “All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten” shows just how low our society has come. Sure it is meant to be humorous, but is it really? Really what we should be saying (and most importantly-living) is “All I really need to know I learned from the scriptures and classic books.”

Sadly, few today understand the classics. Walk in any Barnes and Noble or Borders books and you will see shelves full of cliff notes and other books with (someone else’s) interpretations of classic works. These books completely defeat the purpose of the true unabridged classic book. We cease to learn and grow when we are looking for someone else’s take on a classic book. The purpose of the classics is to inspire and teach your very core, the person that you truly are. They remind us through other’s experiences and lives whether ill or well lived. We don’t have a long enough life to experience everything so learn from other’s examples, especially the examples of truly great people. This is what happens to those who strive to get a true classical education. One cannot help but become a better thinker and most importantly a truly great person.

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Shiloah Baker is a mom of seven, pregnant with #8, married to the man she's madly in love with. Exercise is her vice. She runs a The Homemaking Cottage and homeschools. In her spare time she sews, crafts, writes and reads. Join us at The Homemaking Cottage Deluxe Edition for 1057 ways to improve your home and family! http://www.homemaking-cottage.com/

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An Average Day in My Life

The life of a homeschooling mom of seven who runs a home business online

By Shiloah Baker

Morning comes way too soon in my world. Every morning I awaken by the bedroom door slamming open and someone screaming, one of the following,

“Mom, so and so stole the kitty away from me and she won’t give it back!”

“Mom, so and so won’t make me breakfast!”

“Mom, can I have a snack?”

My answers aren’t as patient as they should be at this time of day, “What? No! Whose day is it for breakfast? Leave my room, all of you!” Mornings are not my favorite time of day. Nights, now that is the time of day I’m at my best! Is it night yet?

I usually am wide awake by the third interruption, but before leaving my bed I visualize my day, especially if I plan to run that morning. Saying a quick prayer I drag myself out of bed to get dressed. I sleep in without guilt or regrets. I’m up on an average day about 9:30am. The bathroom floor is slightly sticky even though it was mopped two days ago thanks to a little sneaky someone who dumped half a bottle of hand soap on the floor. I try to take a mental note to assign that out as a cleanup chore to someone.

Never do I leave my room undressed or without perfume and depending on the day, without make-up. I always brush my teeth and floss, especially now that I’m avoiding a root canal. My hair is brushed…wait! Where’s the hairbrush? “Chloris and Maia, I need you to help find the hairbrush!” It never shows up until I’m downstairs checking emails and calling the kids to remind them of it. Rule #1: always look for missing items in the unusual places first at my house: the next door neighbor’s porch, the garage, the car, the refrigerator drawer. I quit asking the question, “Why?” because I’m never satisfied with the answers.

Upon leaving my room, every morning I see four laundry baskets overflowing with dirty clothes lined up in the hall next to the laundry closet and I ask someone to start a “big” load. I hug and kiss the little people who are waist high and below as I pass them in the hall. Taking a quick peek in each bedroom, I’m never disappointed to see messes- they’re always there, they happen. I call the kids from all corners of the house and assign clean up bedroom duties and make sure they’re all dressed. Most of the time, half of them aren’t.

Checking emails to see what I missed from the night before is a must especially when I have them all cleaning. Is your thyroid making you fat? Foggy morning brain makes me think about it a minute “Oh man! Is it? No, I don’t think so.” While checking emails I remind the kids about morning devotional in five minutes, which really isn’t until ten minutes but they don’t know that. Everyone must be dressed, fed, rooms cleaned; fur brushed off the teeth, and arrive with their scriptures. “Put the cat down, she’s meowing!” Usually we have a few things to fix before we start like: the baby doesn’t have “unnies” on, Athena is poopie and is stinking up the room, Mercury is trying to get away with wearing a pajama t-shirt instead of real clothing. Inevitably someone forgot their scriptures. No problem, everyone sits and waits until we are all ready. Two more minutes remaining- hurry up, move it, move it, move it!! I’m married to a soldier; I have a military mentor here, can you tell? {smile}

Morning devotional consists of the basics: opening and closing songs and prayer with scripture reading sandwiched in between. Our family’s finished reading Esther two weeks ago and we are now reading Psalms. Reading a book at this time together is completely determined by behavior, much of the time by our six year old autistic daughter. Her only focus is on when she can get back to nature by going outside. We are currently working on the book “Making Brothers and Sisters Best Friends by Sarah, Stephan and Grace Mally. The kids love this book and we often stop and discuss each situation.

Following devotional it’s time to- READY-SET -BREAK! – and the younger ones are off and the older ones report what schooling and reading they’ve done for the day so far. All three older children get up at 6:30am so they can get their schooling done during the quiet hours. When the younger ones wake up they help tutor them. We have been very focused on memorization of all math facts right now depending on the level of the child. We have flash cards galore and notebooks for writing them as often as they feel they need to during this process.

Chore time! I would say it’s my favorite time because some days they are busy bees working hard and getting things done. I would say it’s the worse time some days because I have to stay right on them to get their chores done. While chores are being done, mommy goes to work or makes some phone calls, depending on the day. I have a lot of girlfriends who need to talk and I love to talk, complain and laugh with them! If I plan to run that day, this is the time I go running for an hour. I always come home sweaty and gross and every time I get a loving compliment from one of the middle girls, “Mom, you stink!” I always tell them “Thank you.” Manners are manners, may we always use them. Since I am reminded, this is shower time for me too if I do a morning workout.

After a little bit of website editing or other online business is done, and a fair amount of twitter-ing and facebook-ing, I sit down with the middle kids to do reading, Latin, or anything else that needs help.

Most of the meals are made by my older three children with a few that I literally kick the older girls out of the kitchen for so that I can cook too. They enjoy cooking so much that I end up being a chef for guests more than the family. Now, that, girls is a Mom Promotion! I’m still in charge of the menus, grocery shopping and am “Head Chef” who approves and inspects meals regularly.

After lunch, we’ll read a book or the younger ones sit on mommy’s lap for some little kid books to be read to them. Then it’s time to nap! YEEHAW!

We have the Charge system implemented in our home. Each of the older children is given a younger child as their charge. They are to help with the care of that child from helping them get dressed, bathed, messes cleaned up, and to help keep track of that child when we leave the house. At any given time of the day you may hear, “Athena is poopie again, where is her charge?” or “The baby changed clothes again, wait, now she’s naked. Maia, she’s your charge, get her dressed, please!”
The late afternoon is for finishing school assignments, getting my work done, crafting, playing outside or running errands. It depends on the day and what we have planned.

On an average day I have to know where seven kids are at any given moment. I supervise the schooling and the chores, kiss boo-boos, listen to a million and one tattle tales, listen to any problem or story a child needs to tell me, play “friend” with my toddler, be sure the animals are alive and fed, messes are cleaned, the errands are run, phone calls have been made, and then…give attention to the man of the house.

The man of my life…I am totally and completely in love with him even though he’ll fall asleep folding socks, stirring spaghetti, during scripture study and while we’re talking. Wait a second that ticks me off! Knowing that my husband works hard all day and that he gets sleepy early into the night, I make sure he is number one when he walks through that door. When I hear his footsteps on the porch and I’ve made it my goal to rush to meet him at the door and kiss him like we were just married. I once neglected to do that when I was mad at him and he was so upset by it, so I’ve tried to keep it up mad or not. Time with my husband happens when he gets home no matter if it’s 4:30pm or 8pm. No matter what I have planned or what I have going on. I love him so much and want to spend time with him when I have the chance.

After dinner, we have another “pick up the house” session, everyone gets in pajamas and we meet in the office for scriptures and prayer with daddy. “Maia, wake daddy up nicely, please!” “Quit fighting and be quiet!” “Mercury, don’t shove your sister. I don’t care that she started it first. Be a gentleman!” We are currently beginning Alma. After scriptures and family prayer it is bedtime for the kids and time alone for the adults. Sometimes we’ll let the older kids stay up and read in their rooms or watch an occasional movie.

Before I pass out asleep at night, I read. I also take notes on what I want to accomplish or write about. I always keep a notebook on the bedside table.

I’m not sure if you noticed that I watch VERY little television. That is my secret to getting things done. I will upon occasion watch movies in the evening with my family or husband, but I just find it’s something I gave up like a caffeine addict gives up coffee, so that I could reap the benefits- more time.

*All children’s names are pseudo names.


Shiloah Baker is a thirty something mom of seven, married to the man she's madly in love with. Exercise is her vice. She runs a homemaking business online (The Homemaking Cottage http://www.homemaking-cottage.com) and homeschools. In her spare time she sews, crafts, writes, blogs, and reads. See more weight loss tips at her blog Hot Mamas: Losing Weight and Feeling Great http://www.hotmamasweightloss.com

Christian Family Radio and Classically Based Catalog

On the way home from the grocery store I was listening to this wonderful broadcast on the radio station. I wrote down the website on the grocery receipt so I wouldn't forget it when I got home. I'm so glad I did! I highly recommend this website it is called Family Research Council at www.frc.org . It is radio programs from the family Research Council keeping you abreast of news from Washington with a Christian mix.

Articles made into news broadcasts include things like this. Click the link to download and listen to this newscast:


"Science Czar or just plain bizarre? Hello, I am Tony Perkins with the Family Research Council. Among President Obama's growing list of czars is the White House science czar, Dr. John Holdren. Holdren, along with the sky is falling scientist Paul Ehrlich, who wrote the now-discredited book entitled "Population Bomb" in the 1960's claiming the world was overpopulating and would be out of food by the end of the 1970's, wrote a text book together. Holdren and Ehrlich's book, which they wrote in 1977, was entitled Ecoscience: Population, Resources, Environment. In the book Holdren advocates for radical government action to limit population growth. Among the proposals, forced abortions for women, involuntary sterilization through infertility drugs placed in food or the water supply...." For more visit frcradio.org

This website is very enlightening and I have been making it a habit to listen more to the talk radio shows.

The other thing I wanted to share with you was the Veritas Press catalog. A friend of mine shared this catalog with me as she knows I'm doing TJED which is Classically based.

Things I love about this catalog:

1. It is broken into grade levels so I can, at a glance, be sure I'm not looking at something too easy for the child I'm buying for.
   
   
2. I love the suggested books per grade level. I'm using it as a guide to gauge the kid's school this year. For instance for my eldest (Calypso), it suggested she read the Lord of the Rings series. Well, she's on book 2 already! Right on!
   
   
3. It even includes classically based math books, which I have been on the search for. One for instance by Harold Jacobs.

Hope this post give you some ideas and a couple of new places to visit.

Works alluded to in Monte Cristo (Part 1)

I'm now half way through The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas. I have been compiling a list of works mentioned throughout the book thus far. I'm sure there is more, but these are the ones that stood out to me and that caught my interest. I will break it up into parts. I hope this interests others out there as well. These are all going on my to-read list! ;)

Arabian Nights: Tales from One Thousand and One Nights

Throughout the book the Count of Monte Cristo is either called by a character or two from this book or hinted that he belongs in the book. He called himself Sinbad the Sailor for a time.

Caesar: Alexandrian War. African War. Spanish War

Mentioned in his conversation with M. Villefort regarding chemistry and health.


By The Abbe in the Chateau D’if

Thucydides
Xenophon
Plutarch
Shakespear
Spinoza



Thucydides (Thoukydídēs)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thucydides

A Greek historian and author of the History of the Peloponnesian War, which recounts the 5th century B.C. war between Sparta and Athens to the year 411 B.C. Thucydides has been dubbed the father of "scientific history" due to his strict standards of evidence-gathering and analysis in terms of cause and effect without reference to intervention by the gods, as outlined in his introduction to his work.

Quotations

• "But, the bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them, glory and danger alike, and yet notwithstanding, go out to meet it."[42]
• "The strong do what they can and the weak suffer what they must."[43]
• "It is a general rule of human nature that people despise those who treat them well, and look up to those who make no concessions."[44]
• "War takes away the easy supply of daily wants, and so proves a rough master, that brings most men's characters to a level with their fortunes."[45]
• "The cause of all these evils was the lust for power arising from greed and ambition; and from these passions proceeded the violence of parties once engaged in contention."[46

Books
The History of the Peloponnesian War (English)


Plutarch

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plutarch

Lucius Mestrius Plutarchus[1] (Greek: Μέστριος Πλούταρχος), c. AD 46 – 120 — commonly known in English as Plutarch — was a Roman (of Greek ethnicity) historian, biographer, essayist, and Middle Platonist.[2] Plutarch was born to a prominent family in Chaeronea, Boeotia, a town about twenty miles east of Delphi. His known works consist of the Parallel Lives and the Moralia.

Books

The Fall of the Roman Republic: Six Lives (Penguin Classics)
Lives of Noble Grecians and Romans (Modern Library Series, Vol. 1)
On Sparta (Penguin Classics)
The Age of Alexander: Nine Greek Lives (Penguin Classics, L286)
Alexander the Great
Selected Lives (Wordsworth Classics of World Literature)
The Rise and Fall of Athens: Nine Greek Lives
Roman Lives: A Selection of Eight Lives (Oxford World's Classics)
Greek Lives (Oxford World's Classics)
Essays by Plutarch
Plutarch Themistocles (Bryn Mawr Greek Commentaries)
Moralia
Plutarch's Advice to the Bride and Groom and A Consolation to His Wife: English Translations, Commentary, Interpretive Essays, and Bibliography
Themistocles

Spinoza

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baruch_Spinoza

A Dutch philosopher of Portuguese Jewish origin. Revealing considerable scientific aptitude, the breadth and importance of Spinoza's work was not fully realized until years after his death. Today, he is considered one of the great rationalists of 17th-century philosophy, laying the groundwork for the 18th century Enlightenment and modern biblical criticism.

Books

• ca. 1660. Korte Verhandeling van God, de mensch en deszelvs welstand (Short Treatise on God, Man and His Well-Being).[15].
• 1662. Tractatus de Intellectus Emendatione (On the Improvement of the Understanding). 1663. Principia philosophiae cartesianae (Principles of Cartesian Philosophy, translated by Samuel Shirley).
• Gallica.
• 1670. Tractatus Theologico-Politicus (A Theologico-Political Treatise)
• 1677. Ethics (Penguin Classics)
• 1677. Hebrew Grammar.

Introduction: The Butikofer Family

I've known for some time that I would homeschool my family (3 kids- 6yob, 4yob, 3 yog).  It took Jessie a while to be supportive of this decision.  We put our oldest in a half day pre-k, but pulled him out the next year.  School was changing him, and not in  a positive way.

I didn't know what direction I was to go in.  I knew was what I didn't want-- School at Home.  I knew that I wanted to teach from real books--not textbooks.  Shiloah lent me her copy of A Thomas Jefferson Education some time last year.  I finished it in no time.  I knew this was type of education I wanted my children to get-- it's the education I wanted.  I loved the emphasis on me getting a good education and learning from the classics.  

Maxwell hasn't been too keen on learning anything from me.  I remember starting out homeschooling last year, and every day it was a fight to get him to DO anything.  Yesterday I received Math-U-See's Primer set in the mail.  I wanted to get a feel for what the kids would learn, so I popped in the DVD and watched it with the kids.  After we stopped, Maxwell pulled down the white board and wrote out his numbers 0-9 and mimicked  what he saw on the DVD.  He absolutely hates to write, so I was shocked to say the least.  He and Blake spent about 45 minutes playing Math.  This morning I took out the student books and thought I'd see if there was interest.  Both boys took the bait and stayed busy for about 30 minutes.  We cleaned up, and did some other activities.  Later this afternoon, Maxwell pulls out the student book AGAIN!  I couldn't believe it.  He told me just two days ago that he didn't want to learn math or reading because it's too hard, and here he is voluntarily working.  My heart was full of joy-- almost to tears.  I have seen-- especially in that child-- the importance of waiting until the child is ready to learn.  I'm not quite sure if it's Inspire, Not Require of You, Not Them.  Perhaps a little of both.